- Noah Cracknell
- Posts
- Be F*** Yes or Hell No
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Dinner in Italy with the besties, Ellie & Joey
I apologize in advance for the cursing.
In high school, I was the type of guy to say yes to just about anything. But only as long as it satisfied two conditions: I was excited about it, and it helped me grow.
"Should I apply for ASB?" F*** yes.
"Should I go party the night before a baseball game?" Hell no.
"Should I say yes to four girls asking me out to formal?" F*** yes.
Pictures don't lie
The boy in that picture didn't know he was abiding by this decision-making framework, nor could he articulate it. But today, I know it's simple in theory and in practice.
Derek Sivers was the first to outline the idea in his 2009 blog post No yes. Either HELL YEAH! or no ⬇️
"Use this rule if you're often over-committed or too scattered.
If you're not saying "HELL YEAH!" about something, say no.
When deciding whether to do something, if you feel anything less than "Wow! That would be amazing! Absolutely! Hell yeah!" — then say no.
When you say no to most things, you leave room in your life to really throw yourself completely into that rare thing that makes you say "HELL YEAH!"
Every event you get invited to. Every request to start a new project. If you're not saying "HELL YEAH!" about it, say no.
We're all busy. We've all taken on too much. Saying yes to less is the way out."
Building off Sivers' definition, I added some Mark Manson flare, substituting "f*** yes" for "HELL YEAH!" The principle is simple: only say yes to things you're saying f*** yes about.
In practice, I've added another layer to the framework; the growth axis. The graph below can help you categorize activities based on your excitement level and the potential growth opportunity. It helps illustrate what things you should say "f*** yes" to:
If something is exciting and will help me grow (upper-right quadrant), my reaction is "f*** yes," and I do it.
If something isn't exciting but will help me grow (upper-left quadrant) or is exciting and won't help me grow (lower-right quadrant), I may still do it, but I devote only some of my time here. And if it doesn't excite me or allow for personal growth, I don't consider doing it.
This framework isn't for everything – you still need to take out the trash, do the dishes, and exercise regardless of your feelings. But when trying to decipher life projects to work on, people to hang out with, and experiences to invest in this framework is gold.
Since high school, this decision-making framework has led me on crazy adventures and helped me grow in ways I couldn't even imagine.
In 2019 I said f*** yes to skydiving, accompanying a friend on set for the filming of a Netflix Original, and purchasing a flight to Europe – not knowing what I'd be doing or where I was staying.
That year, I overcame my fear of heights and flying, built lifelong friendships and connections in the entertainment industry, and witnessed the power of the statement, "fortune favors the bold."
In 2020, I said f*** yes to starting a business during a global pandemic, and hell no to being an innocent bystander, letting the puppeteers of society tell me what I could and could not do.
That year, I built a business that grossed $100K in two years while attending college full-time. I also gained invaluable experience as a business owner, leader, coach, and operator – lessons that will serve me for the rest of my life.
In 2021, I said hell no to negativity and f*** yes to writing online consistently. Since then, I've written and published 78 blogs and connected with hundreds of thousands of individuals worldwide.
This year, in 2022, I said f*** yes to closing my business, selling all my stuff, traveling through Europe, applying myself as an academic, writing consistently online, accepting an offer of admission to grad school, and moving to New York City in 2023.
Yes, my eyes are closed.
Although I still haven't processed everything that has happened this year, I know that I did things that set my soul on fire, and helped me grow.
Again, this framework isn't for everything. We must do some things regardless of how we feel about them. But when presented with multiple decisions, I've found listening to what I'm saying "f*** yes" to is a superb framework for distilling down what's important to me and navigating life in a positive direction.
What are you saying f*** yes to right now?
Keep crushing.
Cheers,
Noah Cracknell
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